Healthy and Kind Life Lessons Missed

Some parents in the Orlando, Florida’s Edgewater school district are blowing a great opportunity to teach good manners and empathy.

The Golden rule is, treat other as you would like to be treated. One should try to put others first. Empathy, I believe is a taught skill, not a cognitive skill. Many of the parents in this school district are ignoring these two basic life skills and teaching their children the mantra “me first, me first, I do not care what you need, I want what I want.” This appears to me to be a good foundation for developing a bullying point of view in their children, how darn right selfish.

For those of you that have missed the story, a little girl with severe peanut allergies needs and requires a peanut free environment, and the school district had been requiring her classmates to rinse their mouths twice a day with water and to wash their hands and faces at school to avoid introducing nut residue into the classrooms. It is a life and death situation, not about hurt feelings. If it were your child, what would you want?

This child has the same rights as every child that has a disability. A child that needs a working dog; a child that needs wheelchair accessibility; a child that needs special education; a child that needs an interpreter. These are their rights because they belong to the community where it is law.

We as a society do alter our lives for others that require it because it is the right thing to do. We live in communities that should help and enrich all our lives not just the vocal unfeeling individuals.

Remember Hilary Clinton’s book, “It Takes a Village”? Why don’t these uncaring parents read it? Remember the old proverb, what go around, comes around? I wish no one, child or adult, harm and hardship but I do say have a kind heart.

Are these parents even thinking about the good that these simple requests will give their own children? It is healthy to wash your hand before and after eating; after using the powder room and several times during the day at random.

I would like to see every child be required to brush their teeth after lunch but since this will not happen in the schools around the country, learning to regularly rinse their mouth with water will add to their dental hygiene.

Both of these are healthy, personal habits to get into and will become lifelong habits that will serve them well. Moreover, empathy is a skill that will enrich their lives as they enter adulthood. To be able to teach two healthy physical habits and to teach some emotional growth seems like a winning combination to me.

See what happens when children do not know how to care for their teeth: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/163856/child_dies_for_lack_of_dental_care.html

Can you imagine the guilt these parents would carry around for the rest of their lives if this child died because they did not want their child to have rise their mouth and wash their hands; and when their children get older and realizes that they were part of this problem, they could be crippled emotionally for life. There is nothing as punishing as a guilty conscience.

This is one time that people must be marvelously well-mannered. It is not just a social issue but a life and death issue for a living, breathing human being who deserves the best that people can offer.

Let this community be the cream of the crop. Let it be marvelously kind and generous and they will all reap the reward of a clean conscience. They have the chance to make their community special and if they do not, no one else will.

DINNER PARTY 101: ROLES OF MUSIC, FOOD & GUESTS

I believe the guests at a dinner party are the stars of the evening. The food presented at a dinner party is a supporting player; the music is also a supporting player - it allows for the evening to flow without effort (or at least it appears to be without effort). Music gently leads your guests into a very lovely frame of mind. It creates a soothing environment and allows you to pamper your guests.

I believe we should choose music that remains quietly in the background; it adds so much but does not call attention to itself, it quietly complements the presentation of the meal.

Classical music is a fine choice for background music. It soothes the inner self and adds to the hearing environment. The quiet in the background lends itself to conversation; you are not trying to talk over the words in the music or paying such close attention to hearing the words of the song that you miss the conversation at the table. We are at the party to converse with the other guests, to exchange thoughts, learn what is new in their lives and what is going on in society and not to learn the words of a song. The conversation should take front center stage. Our goal is to have our guests be the stars of the evening and the food and music be the supporting actors.

A perfect piece of dinner music is one that does not fade into the background but is gentle enough that it is appreciated for what it lends to the evenings atmosphere. We take into consideration the tempo and rhythmic progression of music, slow music leads to a more leisurely pace for eating and conversation but do not be to slow as to mimic a funeral!

We all love stars but every star needs assistance, no one can do it by themselves. You will have a hit on your hands with fine food, wonderful music and interesting guests. Such a combination is a sure fire way to have a fun filled evening that everyone enjoys. Your guests feel so special because they are. If you do not make it special no one else will!

A Tussie Mussie? What is it?

Sometimes we just want to do something very special for someone to express our feeling. We have lost the art of making a Tussie Mussie. It is historically a Victorian bridal bouquet but it can be arranged for any occasion. Look at this one found on http://www.bhg.com/.

When we make a Tussie Mussie we choose the flowers and herbs carefully to convey a certain message.

Roses mean love in the language of flowers as Basil means love in the language of herbs. Mint is used to represent hospitality in herb language and Anthurium symbolizes hospitality in the language of flowers; Thyme stands for courage in the language of herbs and Rosemary is for remembrance; Statice is the flower of remembrance, Gladiolus represents strength of character and Garlic Chives is for courage in the flower language.

We can create a lavish creation or a small and lovely nosegay to be carried or put into a wonderfully simply vase.

If the bouquet is to be carried we bound the stems with ribbons to complement the flowers, this makes it easy to carry and adds a flourish to the bouquet.

We can say what we want when we speak the language of flowers and herbs.

When I use Lavender, I am telling someone I am happy and devoted to this person; when I use Roses or Myrtle, I am telling someone that I love them and I may use both flowers!

It is special to make an arrangement filled with flowers and herbs that are meant for someone special.

I find it very nice to include a note describing what the individual flowers and herbs represent.

As I always say, if you do not make it special no one else will. Let us celebrate our own specialness and pass it on to someone that is also special.

LEARNING TO EAT CORRECTLY

“Let food be your medicine and your medicine be food.” Hippocrates

Let’s follow his advice and learn to eat correctly.

Had we followed his advice from the beginning we wouldn’t need to retrain our taste buds: when they (taste buds) have not been given the chance to cultivate the taste for salt and sugar the taste buds adjust and appreciate the taste of what is natural. If only we had extended this concept to foods made with white flour – our taste buds would not crave white bread, bagels, pasta, rolls and the like.

At least we can help our little ones to learn how to eat properly from the start. Their lives will be enhanced. They will be healthier and use food for what it is intended for, to provide energy to live.

Children should not be taught to live to eat but to eat to live. They will be able to enjoy the physical side of life by being able to participate in sports, dance, etc. and not being always on the side lines because their bodies cannot “do.” Let us teach our children to participate in life by enjoying the feeling of their bodies by enjoying physical activities and to be able to continue this physical living well into adulthood, let say 110 years old!

Do not cultivate tastes (develop cravings) for things that do not provide “what the body” needs.

Eating correctly is also beneficial to one’s emotional life.

Our goals in life regarding our families and friends never change but only get better with the new information and ideas that are given to us. We have a huge amount of scientific and emotional growth data available to us, And all of it hinges on each other.

Let us lead marvelously healthy lives by feeding our bodies as well as the soul. When a health body has a health mind, things do not get better than this.

Let us all contribute to a marvelously happy life for all.

PRETTY IS AS PRETTY DOES.

PROVERB: Beauty is as beauty does.

This proverb means, “it is more important to treat people well than to be good-looking; just because you are good-looking does not mean you are a good person.”

American Idiom: An attractive manner is what makes one attractive. Behaviors and actions are what define a person, not the physical looks.

All beauty on the outside does not equate to too much when the insides are totally ugly. I constantly remind myself what matters most is in the reflection of a beautiful lady; her behavior and reactions to all people. People make themselves beautiful with their actions and behaviors.

Unfortunately, this is a lesson not (always) given to our children. It appears increasingly popular to treat people poorly and try to embarrass them. Just watch society as reflected in today’s reality shows, on the play grounds, and in our schools. Treating people poorly appears to be right in vogue.

I would like to point out that if we treated everyone with the respect that all human beings have a right to enjoy, we would be considered very beautiful indeed.

We all know a person who, upon first meeting, we think “how beautiful” but then after watching her behavior, indeed becomes homely - if not downright ugly. Individuals always lose points in the good looks department when their nasty personality shows through their veneer.

People do not want to associate with the beautiful but cruel, they are the “mean girl” of life, the “mean women of life” they come in all age groups; no fun to be around at all, plain disgusting.

Dignity should be given to all people, just the way you want it given to yourself. Let us give each other the gift of beauty.

Is this not a wonderful way to live? Yes, it is!

First rule of manners: Put other people first at all times, Plain and simple, this rule never changes.

Is it not wonderfully marvelous to be beautiful ? Yes it is!